Rash Ramblings

A runner once, an explorer always!

Category : The Mind Game

Saturday

This morning, I walked out in the darkness and came back in the light…Well, it takes a little while to walk six miles.

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Discipline

It has been a while since I posted here. It is not that I have stopped moving. On the contrary, I’ve done well to maintain my morning routine. It is much easier to get up, get out the door and then continue on with the daily grind than it is to stop and gather my thoughts and say something even remotely worth being in print.

It is much easier to get up and let things fall as they may. It is easier, but not necessarily better. It is always good to have a goal. It may guide you to something better or keep you from ending up somewhere worse off than you are now. Habits and routines are built through repetition. I am finding it is better to continually do those things I want to accomplish in short intervals rather than waiting until I can put great effort into that task, because in reality that opportunity might never come. Now again I will push to write on a regular basis, so that I can gain ground in those areas that depend on having something written.

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Still Here

I am still here. I just haven’t been in the mood to write. There are too many distractions right now. There are so many things to finish and so many to start. I guess it is good to have so many things in front of you. It keeps you pushing forward. I hope that never ends.

The running has been somewhat of a struggle this year with the drought and intense heat. I guess it is a good thing I signed up for the Capitol 10,000 back in October. I received a new scale for Christmas. It was nice, but what I saw when I stepped on it was not. I was a half pound heavier than when I started all of this. I knew this was the time to step up the intensity of my workouts and get to doing runs instead of run/walks. It was kind of disheartening that just after I started this push I gained an extra pound four days in a row, so now I was three pounds heavier than when I started. That is not good psychologically. You just have to use it to push you harder. It is getting better though. I am at least ahead by three or four pounds and, hopefully, by mid-February I’ll be back close to what I was when I raced last year. It would be nice to be back somewhere in the 180’s and even better to be back in the 170’s. I probably did as good as I did in college because I was willing to run a lot and I didn’t have enough money to over eat. We’ll see how it goes. The legs and body feel good. My endurance needs to be tweaked and all of it is going to have to come together for me to get the speed I want. Anyway, as they used to say, “Onward through the fog!”

 

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Influence or Influenced

Another day of activity begins. I am out the door in the dark somewhere close to 5:30 a.m. As I pass under the first street light, it is blinding and much brighter than all the others I will come to as it is my first and my eyes are not yet used to the light. It is the dead of Summer. The heat is incessant. There have been over forty days so far with highs over a hundred. Even at this early hour, the air is thick and its touch is heavy. I move out of the light and hope for the most part to soak in my solitude.

I come upon a dog in the backyard across the street. Its barking is unsure and half hearted as though he sensed something was not right, but was not fully aware of my presence. This is just as I would like it. This is my time to be alone. I’m not looking for any “howdy do’s” or “how are you’s” from faceless images in the dark. This is my time to know me and analyze my place in this world. Often I may feel like the person that goes into a crowded room. It is that feeling of being apart, yet still a part of that crowd.

I pass others doing their routine and I do my best to stay out of their path and remain unnoticed. Through repetition you become somewhat aware of their routine, whether you want to are not. You expect to see them here or there and when they do not appear for whatever reason, there is a hole. If you never see them again, you may always wonder what happened to them even though you really have no reason to.

I have been thinking about this in regard to our placement in life. We sometimes find ourselves in what we perceive to be bad situations or unfulfilling jobs for whatever reason. It may not be that we were put in that place or that job, because it was going to do anything for us. What if we were put where we are at a certain time so that we could influence or be influenced by a certain person or certain people. Although you can’t necessarily see it at the time there is a purpose and maybe we should just be the best that we can and let time take care of the why. That doesn’t mean go along aimlessly. You still have to have goals and a plan. It is just that the pacing of this plan is not totally in our control. Take the bumps, fix the flat…but keep on going.

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Crazy in the Heat

Unwilling in this relentless heat to take the time to speak, my blog for a while fell silent. This morning as I made my way out the door I was met by the hot stale breath of Summer. Although, at this point, it was unwelcome, it was not unexpected. At almost forty days over the century mark, this Summer is starting to drag on. I have backed off and am only willing to take a brisk two mile walk in the morning. I will continue with this schedule until we have a week with no days over a hundred. There is no real reason to deplete my reserves in the morning and then totally tear myself down working out in this heat all day long. I keep telling myself it is time to move on, but I know for now i am not quite finished in this capacity.

I watch as others make their way past my view. I wonder the thoughts that go through peoples minds or sometimes even the apparent lack of thoughts. Many people these days move through their routines with either earphones or telephones constantly to their ears. They are so intent on this they are pumping in their ear that they can’t readily react to the occurrences around them. People these days are so distracted and lazy. Too many shortcuts and not enough discipline. We have a society so intent on protecting everyone from everyone else that many have lost the ability to do it for themselves. People are willing to let someone else decide their future.

In my present quest, I choose to change this trend, at least in the scope that I am able. Carefully, I will walk and intently will I find my direction.

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Simmering

It was very still this morning, with only an infrequent breeze that would not move a small feather across smooth glass. It was very muggy and seemed as though that steamy stillness was trying to fill every little crack in your being. I am still in the “hold” mold right now. I walk some and run some. I am trying now to increase the running time and decrease the walking time. The plan is to slowly increase the load. I first aim to slowly get to the 40 – 60 mile a week level and then I will see how much above that I can get. My main goal is consistency.

I also want to lower my per mile time. At this years Capitol 10,000 I finished with an 8:05 per mile average. I definitely think I still have the ability to go below a 7:00 minute per mile for a 10,000 meter. A lot of this is dependent on what I can make myself believe, because there are periods when I feel like I’m on the verge of the old groove. I must find the diligence to focus. Somewhere in this journey, I will find my way to whom I am to become.

Wed  22:22.43 W/R     Thur  20:36.85 W/R     Fri  23:08.82 W/R     Sun  21:12.24 W/R     Mon  19:24.11 R/W     Tue  23:20.08 W/R  Tue  39:00.00 W   Wed  21:23.88 W/R     Thur  18:23.45 R/W


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Six Days and Counting…

Here it is six days away and I am less than enthusiastic. I thought I could start running again, there would be a little adjustment period and then I would be back in my old groove, just a little slower. As it has been, I have seen many days where I was stiff or hurting to the point that I either could not or did not want to attempt a run. My performance at the Capitol 10,000 this year will be determined by the luck of the draw. This is the time of year that my work load is greatly increased and that has already held true. I was thinking about how my legs have consistently felt “dead” and the thought came to mind that with the running and then being on my feet and actively moving most of the day, maybe my legs just aren’t recuperating or rebuilding as they would if they were getting some rest. I’ll just have to hope for a “good day” and run relaxed and as efficiently as I can at the greatest effort I can achieve. Right now I’m thinking I’ll be surprised if I am impressed by my time. I didn’t run today to give my legs a little break and that was probably a good thing as I was out working until after 7:00 PM.  I’ll try for six in the morning.     Sat 17:09.10     Sun  46:02.83

Gary

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Inching Forward

I ran an eight miler back on the sixth of March and the next day a fairly hard six miler and after that I cratered. On top of being tight and achy, my work load has greatly increased and the temperatures are rising. I am glad it is getting warmer. I am so tired of putting on and taking off multiple layers to run. It has been hard to get going for the last week or so. I am back to my longer runs and I hope I can get everything loosened up and ready to run a good race on the 27th at the Capitol 10,000. It is going to be the luck of the draw. I am not at all consistent right now. At the same time, I am so much further along now than I was 10 months ago. I am around twenty pounds lighter now. I am not totally sure where my weight is since my scale broke, but I am back to wearing clothes I haven’t worn in years. All the pain and agony I have gone through has been totally worth it. It always feels so much better after I finish.

Looking at where I was and where I am now makes me feel good, but I don’t know how realistic I was to expect that maybe I had a chance to go from no running to thinking I might have a chance to finish in the top ten in my age group at the Capitol 10,000 with less than a year of training. All this while still trying to maintain my work commitments. I do want to continue this routine, but right now I’m not sure I want to commit to running next year’s Capitol 10,000. I’ll make that decision when it is time.     Tues  36:01.34 Walk     Wed  59:33.21     Thurs  34:29.37 Walk     Fri  20:06.76     Mon  18:51.74     Tues  18:50.21     Wed  60:58.17     Thur  58:53.66.

Gary

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03/07/11     Today I wasn’t sure how far or how fast I could run as yesterday I completed a run of a little over eight miles. This was the first time in over twenty years that I covered a distance that long all in one run. I felt amazingly good after the run, but was afraid what I might feel like on waking up this morning. I was stiff and sore and I originally thought I might only do two miles this morning. Instead I decided I would set out on my six mile route and go as far as I could. I made it all the way. I made it to the halfway mark at 28:47 and so I figured I would finish in about 57:30. All through the last part I felt like I was in slow motion, so I was pleasantly surprised when I looked at my watch after I finished and it said I had completed this loop in 56:39. That meant I had run the second half in 27:52…almost a minute faster than the first half.

It is now getting to be crunch time as the Capitol 10,000 is only about three weeks away. I really don’t have a good feel as to what kind of time I can run. I estimated my time at 44:00 on the entry. I WANT to run around 38:00. Thirty years ago I was down around 33:00, but I was also at least 40 pounds lighter. Some of how I do will be determined by how much more weight I can shed before then. A lower weight and my ability to get into a more efficient running form will be the big determiner on how close I can come to my goal. I originally set as my goal to finish in the top ten in my age group at the Capitol 10,000. The question will be…”can I do it this year or will I have to wait another year?” At this point I am not even sure if I will want to run the Capitol 10,00 again next year. So, right now I just push on and wait to see what unfolds.      Thu  56:05.43     Fri  17:31.64     Sat  34:21.39 W  Sun  76:04.00     Mon  56:39.06

Gary

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Breaking The Ice!

02/15/2011    Yesterday was the ice breaker for my running of late. The extremely cold temperatures have kept me off the road.

02/19/2011    I started that posting above on Monday, but was distracted and didn’t get back to it until just now.  A certain amount of inspiration has to be present not only to get you out the door and down the road, but also then to share your thoughts and experiences. I have stood in disgust at these last few weeeks as I either lose some of what I have gained or gather in some very valuable rest and recuperation. I have regretted somewhat at making this commitment to run the Capitol 10,00, but at the same time I guess I don’t really have anyone but myself to raise much of a question if I was to decide not to follow through. It is on me and I wil follow through. After the race, I wil reevaluate this situation. I like getting up early in the morning and the wlks are very good for my mental well being. I’m just not sure if I am supposed to run.     01/21  18:46.50     01/24  W33:46.60    01/25  47:34.94     01/26  18:02.92     01/28  56:27.13    02/06  W34:58.89     02/14  33:12.20     02/15  18:18.97     02/16  18:08.00     02/17  17:06.58     02/18  18:18.90     02/19  56:03.81

Gary

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